Thursday, March 13, 2014

Having a bad day? You can stick your Happiness Club ......

We all have bad days - me included. I thought I would share a little about a positivity challenged day for me recently.
 It started with a late  call off by a client, ok nothing major but meant reduced income for the week.  As the sun was shining I decided to head out and enjoy a longer walk with my dog so I came home feeling happier.

Next I had a difficult call from a colleague raising issues that left me feeling angry, upset and confused.  Much harder to shift this stuff - I knew I had to vent the anger so I stomped around, did some EFT then told a trusted friend about it. When her response helped me to laugh I felt much better.

Then came the techie challenges - getting things arranged for Happiness Club sessions I had wanted to share some video footage as part of the training for the evening.  Computer problems, sound issues and my IT guru not home!  OK use the logic and fault find - no change and now time was slipping away arrgghhh!  Hubby arrives home - "I may have to rebuild it "  NO! don't have time for this.   He fabulously sorts an audio version of stuff for me as I scrabble to print off a revised idea.  Guess what?   Printer is  out of ink.  Back to old fashioned paper and pen so the day is saved!

I know that this was not a major event - it was a series of irritating things. The Happiness Club night was all about Positivity - exploring optimism v pessimism and how to focus more on the positive.  But after the day I had boy did I also need it!   The night spent with the group sharing ideas and insights,  talking about how we spend our time, what we give our attention and focus to and how find ways to focus on the good stuff had restored my natural happy balance.  I had used my core strengths of optimism, hope and humour and felt a lot happier. 

Full of good cheer and wanting to share it with the world  - I posted on my Facebook page a thank you to the Happiness Club for returning my good mood.  But the day was not over yet.  Back comes a comment from someone who was clearly having a very bad time - much more serious than my minor grumblings, and she vented her anger telling me where to stick my Happiness Club!!!


Life throws lots of stuff at us. Sometimes its little things but when they come together we can feel hard done by and annoyed. Sometimes life gives us huge challenges to face - death, job losses, relationship breakdowns, serious money problems and  illness that can really pull the rug from under our feet. 
Our reactions are not the same, the problems can affect the intesity of our feelings and one solution does not fit all.  I know that finding ways to let go of the bad feelings, the anger, hurt, sadness  and frustration we experience is needed before we can focus on the positive stuff.  I understand why that lady told me to shove my happiness club.  BUT here's the thing I know for sure - directing your anger onto someone else doesn't help.  Recognising that we can take responsibiilty for what we do next - for how we react to the situation is key. 

Do you stay a victim and blame everything and everyone for your difficulties or choose to learn and move on, to do things differently and change patterns.  The lessons shared at this month's Happiness Club from Martin Seligman, the father of positive psychology, shows we can change, we can learn to be more optimistic, to focus our attentions elsewhere and create more positivity.  

I know this to be completely true, having experienced the loss of my son Calum I chose not to remain bitter and angry at the world. I vented the emotions and then focussed my attention on bringing happiness into my life again. ( You can read more about this  in my book From Heartbreak to Happiness)  I used simple things to begin with and you can do the same.

March to Happiness Challenge.
March 20th is the second UN International day of happiness. Last year I was presented with a Happy Hero medal for my work on spreading happiness - I can't believe it's a year already! My medal was passed on to my happy hero who then passed it on to another and so on.

I had been thinking how I could spread happiness further this month and have created a FREE March to Happiness Challenge. I am sharing some easy tips to boost your mood and feel happier each week this month. It's really easy to do and can even boost your business and your health!
Each Monday and Friday in March I have produced a short video sharing easy ways to focus your attention on the positive stuff, to boost your mood and feel better.  You can join in and see how these simple things can make a difference to you.
Here's the first video

Join me on my Facebook Group : and let me know your thoughts.  There are 2 other videos on there too.

 Are you ready to give it a go? Feeling happier will not magically change your circumstances but I know that it can help you look at those circumstances from a new perspective. You may even find answers to things that you thought were impossible. You may find that your bad days may not be so bad anymore.  

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